up - up - up

Those blue candys get me up, don't they.

First after dinner ride this year. Now I can write a 2 in front of my total Km's.

M

Turn me on!

... and I will come

M

GO, MAN, GO!!

DANCE, DANCE, DANCE!!!! Better living

through chemistry!!!!

Strong-Men!

Don't try this at home, folks... he's a trained professional!

Banagra

Stonecastle, Ohio - Saying that he became a slave to his penis when he was prescribed Viagra, Ohio resident John A. Wills filed suit today in Seabury County court against Pfizer Inc., the makers of the drug. 


“These little blue diamonds are playing havoc with my thoughts” said Mr. Wills, a creamatory operator. “As I have got older, my wife is complaining about me and our personal sex things, so I saw my doc and he gave me this prescription for Viagra 100mg. Well, I have to admit they do work the way the instruction video says that’s for sure. Wow, is she happy.” 

So why the lawsuit? “Well,” continued Wills, “you see it’s this way. I take a pill about 5 in the morning. The wife likes to start her day with ... well, you know ... a little fun. Then, about 7 or so, I go to work. It’s a 25-minute drive on a good day. And I have begun to have these kinda hot, day-dreaming periods as I am driving. Twice already I have almost hit a tree; and once I just about ran into a semi full of chickens.” 


“ You see I am actually thinking about the great sex I have just had and now I can’t even focus on driving,” Wills continued. “This drug is taking my thinking abilities away from me and I am sure I am going to die. At least.”  

Asked if he was also having problems driving with such a drug-induced obstruction, he replied, “Oh yea, I almost forgot about that part. I can’t seem to turn corners very well, and sometimes I can’t shift into reverse either.” 

“Once I get to work, I have to be real careful for several hours,” related Mr. Wills, “it is almost noon sometimes before the drug wears off and I can even walk around, let alone start thinking about my job without showing a red face. The boss’s wife looks real suspicious at me some days, like I have a disease or something.”  

"So my attorney brother-in-law says that I should be able to get some relief, that's his word, about this situation. At least that's what he thinks, and I agree with him," said Wills. "Why shouldn't they pay something. That's what I think too."  

No one was available at Pfizer, Inc. for comment at this time.

M

Really? It STILL Goes Up?

... and up... and Up... and UP!
MenWerro: A LOT more than SHITSTRONG!

It still goes up!

While sitting outside and enjoying a fine coffee we saw this ship waiting to pass under the bridge of HWY 101. 

Before the bridge opens, the sirens go off and tourists are always asking "what's happening?" Standard answer: THE GERMANS ARE COMING!

Lucky World War II is over ...
Happy Grousing to all

M

YEEEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAAWWW!!!

I ain't no Clapton... or no Monty Python...

First day of the year on the bike. Thanks, Jens, for the kind offer... while would love to try the Snow Grouse, you can see I have a Famous Second Chin from the Famous Grouse warming my long winter nights!

Cheers,

SpringFeverGrouse

Everything is possible

Murray,

this is real with the whisky.
How much do you want?.
What a sorts you need?



whisky dealer
Jessica & Jens
J & J company

Newfie (White) Snow

Good to see our Bitcho sittin' back a la dolce vita while the KKlaptons and I are snow blowin' and Jens is on da mend... life's rufff, eh Bitcho! Jens, send over some of the SnowGrouse if you have lots; I can't get that stuff here in NewfieLand. That bottle would look groovy in my Natural Backyard Cooler. Men's Corona may be gettin' warm in the sweltering heat of Oregon, yet my Corona is nice and chilled ... then again ... those Corona bottles are so tiny the beer never gets a chance to get warm around me, especially for the first BBQ of the year. Randy - send us PigZilla; we'll make sausages with the snowblower!

Cheers!

SpringCanuckGrouse

Orygon snow (white)

Lisa aka snow-white.

Don't worry, Adele is not far ...

No snow here on da Coast. We are sitting outside and enjoying the "Oregon Rain". KKlaptons in Colorado, your ElTorro is looking cute. Do you want me to send a spoon over?

Bitcho

Legal worker

Just hired a legal worker that can climb safely any ladder. Now I have to show him how to do roofing ... for more click here

Not illegal

Just finnished my job. All snow got mowed away - now I am gonna put my "designed for women" shirt on and will be on da look for snow-white (Schneewittchen) in Old Town Bay Street.

IF the winter is longer

Für Murray,
Hi NewfieLand Grouser,

Murray you can`t go bicycle!
My TIPP drink " THE SNOW GROUSE".



keeps warm you..........



Supplies for a week, Murray.



Schnarch guud..........
Sächsischer Humor!!!

Hola Illegals (not sick birds)

Buenos dias. Gracias!
A dozen seasonal workers showed up early to
clear the neighborhood driveways.


Kurt and his TORO finished the job. Nice wet spring
blizzard. Thank you mother nature. Snow day for the schools.
K&K

Fire to Hell

Randy, stop playing around with your sex shooter now and bring Churchie Pigzilla over to our Hellfire. Let's start the party!

May those who love us love us,
and those who do not love us,
may God turn their hearts,
and if He cannot turn their hearts
may He send them into Randy's trap
that we may know them by their grunting.

AMen

Good Rubber's Hard to Find...

Before sending the Saturn out to pasture I took the rubber off of it... my beautiful X-Ice's. They'll still fit our '01 Toy 'Rolla. Tried the Bridgestones. Softer rubber meant great grip, but wore down really fast. Similar tire tread to the X-Ice's. With their quicker wear, you actually did well to get them off a little early... as long as the Prius stays upright.
Do what we do in NewfieLand... bunker down, hot chocolate and/or Grouse, and let the White Shit do its thing. Life's too short. No need to make it shorter by trying to 'be a productive citizen' and out playing Russian Roulette on four wheels... Shag dat.
Cheers,
PhilosopherGrouse

Give 'ER, Randy!!!

UH-OH!!!!!

See these tires? These are Bridgestone

Blizzak WS60 snow tires ( we couldn't get

Michelins in the states because Newfie

Grouser,'The Great' bought them all).

These work great on the Prius in the winter,

but, we aren't having winter in Colorado this

year. So we took these tires off the Prius last

week and put the summer tires back on. We

are now in the throws of a winter storm that

will leave us with 20.32-40.64cm of snow on

the roads. Say it with me, folks " KURT IS A

DOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!

K&K(the dope)

Pigzilla has fun with the Lion

I am well aware of the dangers getting to close to the Churchies, I fear mostly for my dog Bubba because he thinks he can take them on and has killed two small babies, but it is a different story with the big boys.... Just the other moon lite night I was on my way to the barn and stopped to take a leak by the rocks in the lower left of this picture.... standing there enjoying the moon while the puddle was spreading below me, Bubba being a good Labrador dog flushes out Pigzilla from the hill above me.... Pigzilla charges by right in front of me with Bubba hot on his tail.... 2 seconds later Pigzilla chases Bubba right back to me.... By now I'm trying to stuff my still dribbling six shooter back into my pants while swearing like a drunken sailor.... This must have look pretty silly to Pigzilla because he grunted and turned away.

Pigzilla wont be interrupting me anymore of my nature calls, I finally trapped the big booger last night. A large feral pig in Hawaii weighs about 150 lbs, this guy will weigh in at around 200 lbs. The close set eyes are typical of the inbreeding common among human Churchies.
His broken teeth are from sticking his nose where it doesn't belong, typical of Churchie behaviour.

Still No Deer!

Dubya used to say "Don't mess with Texas." Well, Dubya, you can keep your little Texan pussies... here's a real beast. The island of Newfoundland where I live has only 14 natural native species... one of which is the Newfoundland Lynx, a sub-species of the Canadian Lynx. No deer before, no deer now. "Our" lynx is larger than the Canadian Lynx, and has been known to hunt caribou calves when hares are not available. These lynx are solitary and are night-movers over large territory. My father and I came upon one about 25 years ago when we were checking snares early in the morning around Birchy Lake, and it was, all at once, the most magnificent and intimidating creature I've ever seen.

Cheers,

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

No Deer!

Deer don't eat no cones
Deer don't eat no stones
Deer don't eat no chains
if they got brains

Deer don't eat cones - Klaptons! They are ruminant and were chewing their cud while sitting on the cones. That's what I learned in school ...

M

Yes Deer!!!

We did not notice in the cactus/yucca open space the camouflaged

deer that were 5ft. from the walking path until Kurt heard a

crunching noise. They must have been munching on

fallen pine cones. We will keep our fingers crossed that

the school kids get a snow day Friday. We need more

Canadian white s--t.

K&K

Angels for Klapton

K&K, can't reach you via your hotmail address, it gets bounced. I give up! 

Hotmails sucks. Get rid of them but keep da paint on da blog - ya? Saw this guitar strap at the bike shop. I like angels, especially nacked ones! I bet Kurt does too.

M da Devil

The End of the Universe

Men will be happy to hear that, thanks to corporate America, there is proof of no such thing as a "just and loving god" ...
I love these corporations as much as I love Dubya.

Cheers,
LewisBlack & NewfieGrouse

Lick my nipples

Timmy & me working on the rear wheel spoke nipples after taking it off the bike. The front wheel got red nipples already. I do the easy work, changing the nipples and Timmy gets to true the wheel. Trueing a wheel is art work. He does it since many many moons and best of all, he needs 1 eye only to do so!

M

Can You Believe This (White) Shit?

Funny thing... in Canada, a new car comes with 'all season' tires, even when bought in winter.

Funny thing #2... there's no such thing as 'all season' tires if you live in Canada. In winter, there are two types of drivers to go with the types of tires. There are : 1) winter drivers (drive according to road conditions) with winter tires (I recommend Michelin X-Ice) and 2) dead drivers with dead tires...

It is to laugh. Again.

Today the only 'all season' I've seen is our weather. Woke up to beautiful sunshine and a couple of degrees Celsius. Then snow by mid-afternoon. Now ice pellets. Rain coming tonight.

When can I stop laughing at all this Whit Shit????

Cheers,

RedShovelGrouse

Swiss Engadin

Murray and Kurt, how does this snow blower make you feel?

I don't know what happen to Sepp but I am sure he's not biking in the Engadin. Well, at least I hope he is not ... Might be the reason why he's not posting. Hard to get interwebs (or what did Dubya call it?) connection under the snow probably.

M

True story #2

Seems that Dubya is bored in retirement. He came to Calgary, Canada, last week, home to Canada's oil industry, to speak to businesspeople at a $4000 a plate dinner. 1500 attended inside, but the louder hundreds of demonstators outside called for the war criminal to be brought lynched. Shoes were taken off and waved; yet polite Canuck protestors didn't throw 'em...

Then I hear news that the self-titled "Decider" is writing a book defending his decisions in office... I guess being married to a librarian comes in handy... she'll get his homework done.

It is to laugh.

A-Men

Randy the Lion

Randy watch out trapping those churchies!

Dr. Mon (a true story)

I crashed 2 years ago while riding my bike. The elbow didn’t look too happy but I refused to go to the local Christian Hospital. Lucky for me, Doctor Dostal a good friend of ours was in town.

I got anesthetized with Canadian Crown Royal whisky and Monica fixed me up. Thanks Mon, you ma Queen!

I told Murray about it and he recommended Famous Grouse. That was the very beginning of this Blog. Murray got everyone hooked to Grouse, even Monica bought a bottle last week!
I called to the US distributor of Famous Grouse and was told Murray is gonna get a prize from them. Since they are on a budget all they have as promotional-give-away is a new US-made Saturn car. 
Well I said, Master Murray just got rid of such a shitter, how about 3 bottles of 12 Year Old Grouse? Negative, it would blast up their budget …

And here we go again:
God, if Murray can’t have what he wants, let him want what he has.
And cheers!

YEAH! FIONA!!

YOU BEAT THOSE MEAN, NASTY

GERMS! NOW YOU WILL STAY

HEALTHY WITH CHOCOLATE!

YEAH!!!

Celebration Time!

After four months to the day of being prescribed a heavy cycle of medications to go with 3-1/2 hour surgery to get rid of a rare infection, Fiona, our youngest, has been taken off the meds! As promised, we got a Chocolate Fudge Ice Cream Cake from Dairy Queen on the way home to celebrate, and big sister Zoe's happy to join in the festivities. It ain't just Greg LeMond back in the days of the Tour de France who has been dreaming of Dairy Queen!

Cheers,

DaddyGrouse

(PS: Come to NewfieLand... we'll share the snow AND the cake, too!)

Learning to share!

Finally, after months of begging and pleading, Murray,
Newfie Grouser The Great, has shown mercy on us in
the arid B-R-O-W-N. Thank you! Thank you!, for sharing
your precious white s--t. The Colorado plains are 127cm.
below normal snowfall for the season...can we spell drought?
K&K

CRAZY
SWISS
GUY!!!!!!

And it's still up

God, if I can’t have what I want, let me want what I have.
And cheers!

Try to call me

Everybody has a cell phone. Everybody?

Yeaahh, everybody! Cell phones look great when screwed to the wall!

That's the way I like them.

Pretty White Shit

With the freezing rain that followed our 30cm of snow, we had a sunny day here, where Robert Frost would've easily been inspired to read his "Birches" ... maybe Kathy taught that poem before in school. As the White Shit goes, it's beautiful. Didn't have my camera on me at the best time, and by the time I got it, I "lost the light" ... but this birch give you a bit of the idea near sunset.

Cheers,

FreeeeeezyGrouse

No more flats

Yeaaahhhh, this is THE solution! No more flats, never have to true a wheel anymore. Saves on gas and tires.

Hey, do NOT click on this picture. You've been warned!

M

Read my shirt

Yep, Bike Ride today!

Vrroooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmurray, no Angel here as everybody can see. Looks more like a Devil faaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrt.